“Bed rotting” is a term TikTokers have coined for lying in bed for hours while binge-watching, scrolling through your phone or laptop, or napping. It might seem harmless to “bed rot” every now and then, but should you be concerned if it becomes a regular habit? DailyOM interviewed a mental health expert to explain when it is no longer a form of self-care, but a sign of a larger issue.
Whether it’s deadlines at work or the weight of personal issues, you’ve probably felt burned out at some point in your life, which means you’ve likely engaged in bed rotting, as the TikTokers are calling it.
Bed rotting is when you take an extended relaxed break while lying down and do immobile activities as a form of “self-care.” Maybe you use this time to scroll on your phone, binge-watch shows on your laptop, eat delicious snacks, nap, or stare blankly at the ceiling.
While slowing down is crucial — especially in our present culture, which has ingrained a toxic hustle mentality in many of us (millennials, you especially know what we’re talking about) — there are a few things to be cautious about when engaging in the viral bed-rotting trend. We spoke to Kate Cummins, PsyD, a California-based licensed clinical psychologist, to find out how to rest, reset, and calm your nervous system in a sustainable and responsible way.
When Is Bed Rotting Beneficial?
Modern American society is inherently stressful and can sometimes make you feel like you’re running on a hamster wheel. Maybe you have a busy schedule at work or you’re feeling exhausted from taking care of kids, a dog, a parent, or a business. Or maybe you’re a human simply existing in 2023, in which case it makes sense that you’re overwhelmed.
“It’s a good thing to give both your brain and body permission to relax and not worry or stress, as this will reset the parasympathetic nervous system into the rest-and-digest phase and detach you from extra stressors and fears,” Cummins tells DailyOM. “When you’re feeling overwhelmed, or when your mind or body physically needs a rest and reset, it’s okay to use the tool of keeping your body in a relaxed and calm position.”
The main purpose of the parasympathetic nervous system (aka the “rest-and-digest” side of your nervous system) is to conserve energy for later use, slow down heart rate and blood pressure, and regulate bodily functions like digestion and urination, according to the National Library of Medicine. If you don’t allow your body to go into this rest-and-digest phase, and your body’s sympathetic nervous system (aka fight-or-flight response) is excessively activated, this can lead to elevated levels of stress hormones, high blood pressure, clogged arteries, gastro issues … we’ll spare you the rest.
No wonder it’s vital to take time to slow down and relax. While meditation and journaling are popular ways for people to release stressful energy, they don’t work for everyone. Bed rotting can be an effective tool for some people to truly decompress and lighten their mental load.
Interested in learning more? Check out Finding Peace in a Noisy Mind
When Can Bed Rotting Be a Sign of Depression or Another Mental Health Issue?
It’s one thing to spend a Sunday cozied up under blankets, watching your favorite show and munching on your favorite snacks or ice cream. It’s quite another thing when you’ve done that every day for two weeks as the only form of self-care.
“Coping skills are only beneficial in moderation. A lot of anything, whether it’s working out too much, lying around too much, spending too much time with people, etc., can be indicative of mental health symptoms that may be cause or concern for a mental health diagnosis.”
If you’re in a depressed mood all day, every day, and aren’t able to find pleasure in daily activities that used to bring you joy for at least two weeks, it may be time to seek professional mental health support, Cummins says. Additional signs that you may be depressed include feelings of emptiness; feelings of sadness; sleep disturbance; anger outbursts or irritability; lack of energy; slowed thinking; significant weight loss or weight gain; feelings of guilt or worthlessness; and thoughts of suicide.
“If you find that you have been choosing to lie in your bed more than average (as in you’re lying in bed for extended hours outside of evening sleep hours for at least two weeks), and these symptoms of depression are also a part of the reason you’re choosing this behavior, it could mean that your mental health is suffering and it’s time to find adaptive coping strategies that are alternative to what has become your norm,” Cummins says.
She suggests moving your body or making behavioral choices where you’re engaging in activities that will help you get out of your funk. Also, you can look into therapy if you’d like to get out of your bed-rotting cycle.
Other Relaxing Things to Do Instead of Bed Rotting
If you’re wondering what other things you can do aside from bed rotting to calm your nervous system and recharge, Cummins offers a few ideas below:
- Listen to music and move your body.
- Go for a walk (in nature, if that’s available to you, and if not, still go for a walk).
- Meditate.
- Light candles and sit with your thoughts.
- Write in a journal.
- Read a book.
- Drink a cup of coffee or tea and think about positive things in your life.
- Meet up with a friend.
Here are a few more strategies to turn to when you’re feeling overwhelmed and want to calm your mind and body:
- Practice self-havening techniques.
- Walk barefoot on grass.
- Try tapping meditation.
- Put your face in a bowl of very cold water or rub an ice cube on your wrist.
- Do box breathing.
Will Bed Rotting Interfere With Your Sleep?
Cummins warns that your bed is not the ideal place to rest during non-sleep hours. “You want to use that area of your home for sleep, so that sleep can be intentional in that specific space,” she explains. That said, we also understand that some people experience a level of comfort in their bed that they can’t find in any other area of the home — especially if they have roommates or nagging children.
Instead, “find other places to relax, like a couch, or put pillows and blankets on the floor to make a nest in your home. This would be ideal for proper sleep hygiene and maximum sleep at night,” Cummins suggests. And who doesn’t love a pillow fort?
“You are allowed to choose anything you do if it feels good, [feels] healthy, and has balance with the opposite behaviors in your life,” she says.
So, go on and bed-rot if you need to — but try building a pillow nest somewhere so you don’t mess with your sleep hygiene, and check in with yourself when bed rotting becomes too much of a habit. Are you just exhausted or is there something deeper that’s making you feel like you need to shut down? Recognizing the warning signs can help you find the right care you need.
